I can’t believe how many people have asked me recently for my son’s social security number to get him a savings bond or other financial gift. With all the identity theft going on and social security numbers stolen, how can anyone think I would share it with anyone? It’s very easy to accidentally misplace a social security number or have your social security number stolen if it’s written down (there are actually How To’s for Identity Theft available online, in addition to all the criminals trying to find out your social security number offline), and after having four people request it in the last two weeks to buy a savings bond, I’ve become frustrated beyond belief.
On one hand, I don’t want to be rude and imply that I don’t trust the requestor. On the other hand, I would never ask anyone for such private information for their child, and to be honest, since my husband and I have an account set up for him, I actually don’t understand why they would insist on a savings bond over donating money to his personal savings account, or giving us cash or a gift card. If I lose it, I have nothing for him, and a savings bond of $100 today as a gift has little value to him until he can use it in 20 years, when $100 will be worth even less.
You actually don’t even need the social security number anymore to give a savings bond as a gift because the gift giver can use their own. When I shared this information with the requestors, they would quickly backtrack. If they don’t want us to know their social security number, to protect their own identity and protect their own credit, what makes someone think I’d want them to have my son’s social security number?
I keep trying to think of a good response when people ask, but apparently I’m the rude one for not simply freely handing out my baby’s social security number. The four conversations went like this:
I’d like your son’s social security number for a savings bond.
I don’t feel comfortable giving that out. If you really want to get him a savings bond, you can always use your own number.
[Look of extreme offense follow as well as complaints to my parents that I was rude]
I’d like your son’s social security number for a savings bond.
We really don’t need a gift. Your presence at his party is our gift.
No, I’d really like to get him a savings bond.
Well, I have to search for it, but really, you don’t have to.
Ok, search for it. I’ll call you later in the week to check up.
I’d like your son’s social security number for a savings bond.
We have an account set up for him. If you want to give him a financial gift, you can give us the money to put in his account.
No, I’d like to choose my own financial gifts for him. I think savings accounts are outdated anyway.
[and savings bonds aren’t? and questioning our financial choices for our son is not rude??]
I’d like your son’s social security number for a savings bond.
You don’t need that anymore. You can use your own, or give him a different type of gift.
[We never heard from them again, lol….at all]
I’m not sure if it’s because a savings bond looks like a bigger gift (a $50 savings bond costs $25) but the inconvenience to the parent who has to hold on to it for many years for it to mature, making sure not to lose or misplace it, and having no gift at present to offer their child, on top of the insecurity of having their child’s social security number out in the world of identity theft, makes a savings bond a very poor gift choice to me. A small gift of money or a gift card, a toy or clothes, or simply time spent with the child, all make much better gifts for a child and are more useful and convenient for parents as well.
Just to make sure I don’t seem like a selfish, mean person, because I realize I may be coming across as demanding, I’d like to clarify that I don’t really care if we don’t get a gift at all. I feel gifts are always optional and not required, and I’m happier with our little guy being surrounded by those he loves and no gifts. I just really don’t like the idea of a gift that requires someone to provide his private information in order for him to receive anything. Just come to the party and have cake, and let his important, private information stay private.
Parents, protect your children, protect their identy, prevent identity theft in your family, and don’t give out your child’s social securty number. You can not get a new social security number!
hey!
first of all, my day out with thomas pics will be posted tomorrow..
lol, was just a teaser today (really annoying my parents!)
as for your post..
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN!
our apartment wanted his…
I told them they were crazy… he was just over 1 and i was not giving ANYONE (except the dr office) is SSN
they realized that was not a smart move on our part and dropped it. but i thought they were OUT OF THEIR MIND!
I wouldn't want want to give my kids' ss# out, either.
I wouldn't give that information out either!!! And if someone thinks that you are rude for keeping that info secret and safe then…well…screw them! YOU'RE the parent, YOU'RE the responsible one that has to protect him, his identity and his future and YOU'RE the one who gets to decide! It's YOUR child! If they can't understand that then they can enjoy the birthday cake sitting at the curb! 🙂
When it comes to my kids SSN's, I give them only when ABSOLUTELY necessary. And there are few times that it is actually necessary. So, no, they couldn't have my kids SSN either.
My dad always buys my kids savings bonds for their birthdays. He's the only one besides my husband and I that have the numbers though 🙂
Just explain that he's in the states illegally and you'd appreciate their candor.
Problem solved!
No way would I give that out!
I wouldn't give it out either. I don't give our kids' numbers out except when I fill out our yearly paperwork for the Army. Other than that, no one needs them since my kids don't pay taxes yet.
Tell them your identity theft provider e.g. LifeLock recommends that you don't give out your son's SSN to others for Savings Bond Purchases and that you are going to follow their recommendations.
My 21 yr old son has 15 savings bonds that he was given at the age of 5 months old for his christening. Even with these already reaching maturity they aren't worth the paper they are printed on. They value hasn't even caught up to the amount on the paper. AND THEY ARE MATURE> They stop gaining interest.
People need to realize savings bonds aren't what they used to be and although it costs them not nearly what they are worth it's a cheap way of buying a gift that appears be like something when its not.
This is just my experience with them. Our family members use their own social sec. numbers I still can't find them even after looking for 4 yrs lol. My response is DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG THAT WILL TAKE ME TO FIND>….holds em off and they get so aggravated after months they either forget or use their own LOL
Part of the deal with a savings bond is that the bond will definitely not be used by anyone other than the kid, and won’t be used for dumb stuff tomorrow. Eg, if you gave most X-year-olds $50, it would likely burn a hole in their pocket, causing them to ask for things that they wouldn’t otherwise want, just because they CAN have those things. Additionally, the parents can’t possibly misspend it (or spend it on themselves). Once the bond matures, the kid should be old enough to know how to responsibly spend it, and/or really know what’s worth spending that $50 on (ie putting it towards a school laptop, vs 25 lbs of gummi bears).
So I’m kind of a fan of savings bonds.
That being said – I think the SSN thing is ridiculous. Any person should be able to say, I prefer not to ever commit my kid’s SSN to paper (or computer) because it’s so easily lost or stolen, and any reasonable person should be able to accept that, even if they don’t agree.
The second situation might have been your fault for trying to be gentle, although after the first situation I can understand why it was harder.
The third situation, well, if someone wants to give a savings bond, for the reasons listed above, they’re certainly not going to want to give you, or the child, cash for an account that you can take money out of. Perhaps if you had a college fund set up for him, people would like to give toward that, and it would have the same “feel” as the savings bond for them, but be in their control?
Also, this comment submission box is not being good friends with Firefox 6.0 Beta. I can’t go back and fix a typo or change a word in a sentence, unless I delete everything I wrote all the way back to the typo, and then type it all back in. I can’t select stuff, copy/paste, move the cursor with my arrow keys OR the mouse. Just FYI!
grr. have the same “feel” as the savings bond but be in YOUR control.
As of January 2012, you cannot purchase a bond as a baby gift without the child’s social security number. Try and put yourself in the giftgivers place. I wanted to purchase a bond as a baby gift to give to new parents and feel vey uncomfortable asking for the child’s social security number for the same reasons you stated above. However I also don’t feel comfortable putting my own number in as a substitutuion. It would seem by making this option no longer valid, the government is cutting of a source of funds. (baby bond) See website for US Treasury: http://www.treasurydirect.gov
I have also called them at this number to confirm there is no other option: 1-800-722-2678
What a shame!
I wrote this a couple years before the new requirement, so thanks for the update! Honestly, though, if someone doesn’t trust us enough to put their own social security number on a paper they provide me, how on earth can they think I’d be ok giving them my child’s to run around with (at least they know theirs by heart, they’d have my child’s on a piece of paper they could lose, and the kind of relationship in which someone would have my child’s social security number should be one of mutual trust).
It’s just plain better to write a check or give cash, a smaller amount is fine for the security factor, or another gift. I can’t put my child’s financial security at risk for a present, kwim?
I found your site via google as I was looking for an answer to this issue. My daughter is almost five months old now, and we’ve had a few requests for her SSN to have bonds issued to her. I don’t know how to go about telling them no, as they’re in-laws and feel entitled to the information, but I can at least use your tactics now to maybe delay them a bit! 🙂
I fought with my mother in law over this…she was *offended* (my husband had to step in and tell her that we made this rule and can’t break it for anyone). No one is “entitled” to anything, and once we become parents, protecting our kids is more important than pleasing others. They are careful with their own social security number after all, but willy nilly with my child’s.
Unfortunately, people can be unreasonable, so what I do now that works is to say “We don’t want anything, he just wants your love, no gifts! I refuse gifts!” and they laugh and it usually works, no talk of my not trusting them. I’d rather have no gifts than risk his financial future for a gift.
Savings bonds are a poor gift idea anyway…they are tied up for many years until they mature, and when they do mature they aren’t worth much because of inflation. Not worth exposing your child’s social security number. Almost ten million people are victims of identity theft every year, and a huge amount are children under ten.
Seriously, I’m astounded that people ask for private information so shamelessly, I would NEVER ask anyone for a social security number for any reason. I’ve stopped giving it to doctor’s offices once I found out they can’t require this information and the insurance id number is sufficient (they may want it on the form, but they aren’t allowed to demand it). Very few institutions are actually allowed to require it.
I agree wholeheartedly, I’m just such a pushover/people-pleaser that I have a hard time with confrontation. When it comes to my little girl though, I’m not going to budge. Not on this at least.
Does anyone know how you can check your childs info to make sure that no one has used their identity? I was watching a thing on the news about a man that was an illegal immagrant that had a little girls social security number and had been using it for years before the girl tried to apply for a school loan and finally caught him. They said that these theives can predict ssn and they have them passed out and sold before a child is even born sometimes???? How can we check now to make sure that isnt happening to our children?
I don’t know, but I get so upset when everyone asks me for a SS #…my son’s pediatrician yesterday asked for mine. Why? I’m not the patient or insurance card holder. How do I know someone in the office won’t steal it? It was inappropriate to ask for and I refused to give it.
Fine, no bonds or stocks for your kid, then. This article is proof of the insularity of present-day parents.
Because my children can only have bonds or stock if someone else gets it for them?? That doesn’t make sense. They can get their own, and us (their parents) can get it for them as well while they are young, and we can choose which we want to get, instead of someone else telling us what we are investing in.