Sometimes I feel like my children are just not having fun being kids, and it’s demoralizing to see how much stress my children have to do well academically, stack up extracurriculars for college, and “perform” in order to prove something. It makes me wish we spent more days building forts and just wasting time and being silly in the past. It really makes me wish my kids felt like they have permission to relax and just be… today. Because they can. I struggle with wanting them to have a resumé of impressive accomplishments so they can get into college (have you seen how competitive it’s become??? I don’t think the term safety school applies to any school anymore) and wanting them to just know they are loved whether they achieve a list of “shoulds” that really aren’t that important in the grand scheme of a 100 year life (and especially not important to be accomplished before 18!).
I came across a book by Jessica Smartt- Let Them Be Kids. And friends, I am inspired. In a world where childhood is increasingly fast-tracked and saturated with screen time, overscheduling, and pressure, Let Them Be Kids (<-- amazon link) is a refreshing and heartfelt reminder of what truly matters in raising children. With warmth, wit, and a firm foundation in faith and family values, Smartt urges parents to protect and preserve the magic of childhood by letting kids be kids. This book isn't a guilt trip. It’s a grace-filled guidebook. It’s not about perfection, but about being intentional. And that’s what makes Let Them Be Kids such a wonderful and encouraging read for parents at all stages.
Key Takeaways and Tips from the Book
1. Let Them Be Bored
Smartt reminds us that boredom isn’t a problem—it’s a gift. Kids don’t need to be constantly entertained. When given time and space, they will create, imagine, and discover. Boredom builds resilience, creativity, and even emotional maturity.
Try this: Declare screen-free afternoons or “unplugged weekends.” Keep art supplies, books, and building toys within reach—and see what your kids come up with when there’s “nothing to do.”
2. Prioritize Old-Fashioned Fun
Smartt encourages families to embrace what she calls “old-fashioned” fun: backyard games, forts, bikes, s’mores, and running barefoot. These timeless activities form the core memories kids cherish into adulthood.
Try this: Make a list of simple, screen-free activities your family loves. Schedule one night a week as “throwback night” to enjoy these low-key, memory-making moments.
3. Teach Manners and Respect
Good manners aren’t just about pleases and thank yous—they’re about shaping kids into thoughtful, gracious adults. Smartt stresses the importance of eye contact, “sir” and “ma’am,” table manners, and taking turns in conversation.
Try this: Pick one new etiquette habit to model and practice as a family each week—like greeting adults properly or writing thank-you notes.
4. Value Innocence
In a culture that rushes kids into maturity, Smartt encourages parents to protect innocence as long as possible. That means being mindful of media, language, and influences that may prematurely expose kids to adult themes.
Try this: Regularly review the shows, games, and books your children consume. Don’t be afraid to say “no” to what doesn’t align with your family’s values.
5. Build a Sense of Family Identity
Smartt talks about creating a strong family culture—one rooted in shared experiences, stories, and traditions. From family mottos to holiday rituals, these moments give kids a deep sense of belonging and security.
Try this: Start a simple weekly tradition—like pancake Saturdays, family hikes, or a bedtime blessing—and make it uniquely yours.
6. Celebrate Courage
Courage isn’t just about big heroics. It’s about facing fear, doing the right thing, and standing up for others. Smartt shares beautiful stories of teaching her kids to be brave in everyday ways—like speaking truth, trying new things, and being kind in the face of peer pressure.
Try this: Make “courage stories” a dinner table topic. Share times when each family member did something brave, even if it felt small.
Let Them Be Kids doesn’t come with a long list of to-dos. Instead, it encourages a mindset shift that relieves pressure and restores joy. It’s an invitation to slow down, look your children in the eye, and say, “I see you. You matter. And I want you to enjoy being a kid.” Whether you’re overwhelmed, exhausted, or just wanting to be more intentional, this book offers encouragement and a gentle nudge back to what really matters. If you’re craving a simpler, sweeter, and more connected approach to parenting, Let Them Be Kids is a must-read.
