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Guard Your Tongue and Your Ears

“A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much” (Proverbs 20:19). Words are very powerful. The Bible and many philosophers throughout history have remarked on the power of the tongue. More than any other thing, what is said has the power to build up or tear down. God himself calls gossiping wicked, the past time of the idle and jealous. Gossip can break up friendships, ruin reputations, and utterly destroy lives. We are instructed to avoid anyone that speaks too much, that speaks ill of others, that tells us the secrets of others. This person is destructive, and will do the same to us. We should not trust someone who is malicious or cavalier about the intimate details of another’s life. We should not open ourselves to them, we should not even associate with them. Imagine being seen talking to a known gossip…who will trust you? We should avoid them entirely.

What should you do if you hear gossip? To begin with, don’t spread it further. It should end with you. It is not only a sin to spread gossip, but to hear it. “The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man’s inmost parts.” (Proverbs 18:8) According to the Bible, gossip goes into our inmost parts. Hearing vile information pervades us entirely. With this image in mind, isn’t it better to simply not even listen to a person that speaks about others? Do not listen with satisfaction, do not listen with pity, do not listen at all. Even if you do not believe the rumors outright, a small part of you may wonder if the slander is indeed true, and you will look at the target of the rumors differently. Do not give a busybody the satisfaction of doing his or her damage.

Do not gossip yourself. I have a much beloved aunt who often says, “Believe nothing that you hear, and only half of what you see”. How often do we see something and totally misunderstand what is happening? It happens too often. Imagine having a wrong view of something and speaking of it, only to have the wrong information now circulating…and it’s your fault. You have now become a liar. Even worse is to repeat something that you have heard without any basis for truth other than hearsay. How would you like for someone to do this to you? Maybe it has been done to you? It is evil and destructive to be a gossip. Do not destroy in your life, be a model of love and kindess. Do not even speak of something with the thought that you are “helping”. If you are speaking of something that you are not 1000% sure of, you are not helping, but the consequences of your meddling could have vast effects.

The effects of our words are serious. We can not take them back. A well known fable goes something like this:

Once upon a time there was a widow who shared an idea about a particular woman, based on her false assumptions and malicious imagination. The scandalous suggestion was spread quickly in the small town, and despite being false, the woman’s marriage was destroyed. When it was discovered that the rumor had begun with the widow, she was embarassed and went to a priest to confess her sin. The priest told her to take a chicken, pluck off all its feathers, and in the town center, let the feathers loose in the wind, and then return to him for the rest of the instructions. She did so, and when she returned to the priest, he told her to now go and gather up every last feather and bring them to him. She objected, because it was impossible to do. The feathers were scattered far and wide and could not be recollected. The priest told her “So it is with your words. Once they leave your lips, you can not ever recollect them. You can’t undo the damage you have done here. Do not gossip anymore”.

Our speach can be evil in other ways as well. Profanity, insults, complaining, and criticism are all also harmful. You can tell more about a person from what they say about others that any other way. Do you want to be seen as a complainer, as negative, as foul-mouthed? Think twice before your speak negatively under your breath.

So what should we speak about? Well, our mothers were right….If we don’t have anything nice to say, better to say nothing at all. When we speak of something, we can ask ourselves first, “Is what I’m about to say true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?” If not, strongly reconsider saying it. Be known as someone who only speaks well of people, or only speaks when she has something worth saying. Let your words have value, and be pleasing to God.




  • Misti Aldrich

    Hi, I’ve read a few of your blogs, and really enjoy them. I agree with you on this topic and wish more people practiced it! I’ll be back to read more!

  • Desiree

    I would love to read the Cat in the Hat with my son. Thanks for the chance!