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When in Boston, do as the Bostonians do. That, of course, means pay homage at Fenway Park, where Boston baseball fans come to worship. While the Red Sox played the Orioles, we had a blast roaming around the streets surrounding Fenway Park, which was set up like a street fair- totally unlike New York sports […]
The holidays are almost here, so some friends and I are sharing some holiday planning tips to make planning for the 2011 holidays easier, thriftier, and more fun! Feel free to share your own tips as well. Holiday Planning Tips 2011 1. Decorate a few weeks before the holidays with classic looks that never go […]
These are really useful tips. I always find myself scrambling during the holidays.
Even better for decorations. Shop after Christmas for next Christmas when everything is super discounted.
Thanks for the tips.
It will be another 6 weeks or so before the doctor can accurately predict the gender of my new baby, and I’m not even sure yet I want to know. This is my last chance to be surprised since we found out little man was a boy at the 20 week sonogram. Of course I’m […]
I also heard that if you crave sweets, it’s a girl and salt, it’s a boy.
The secret project was a scrapbook/mixed media thing for my sister’s b-day!
Oh I have heard of that and remember when I was pregnant people always commented on how I was carrying it determined the sex LOL, but I like this one.
These test are just fun, and fun to compare. And girl your belly if that is what you call it is so cute!
Wohoo, how exciting.
I have never tried it, but maybe I will for this surrogacy lol. After my third boy in a row, I pretty much new my youngest was going to be a boy.
I never tried it, but I can’t wait to hear if yours is accurate!
Never tried the string test. It is funny all the tales we hear when pregnant. Someone told me that if your have heartburn, your baby will have lots of hair and if you don’t, no hair. I never had any heartburn and both had a full head of hair. 🙂
I never tried the string test hehe. but I did do the Chinese one. They said it was gonna be a girl with Landon. LIARS! Lol
I don’t think she really has a belly LOL
I did it with both of my babies and it was right both times! First I had a boy and then I had a girl. Whether or not it’s true, it sure is fun! Wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy 🙂
No I never tried any of those. Hope it’s a girl!
Yep, it was right for me both times! Excited to see if this will be right for you!! I say girl though, I betcha will have a girl!!!!!!!
Funnily enough, I didn’t do any gender prediction tests when I was preggers with my son. We did find out quite early, though, because we had to have tons of sonograms since it was a high risk pregnancy. My daughter is adopted, and her birth mother had her first ultrasound at 37 weeks.
I did it for the fun of it when I was pregnant with my son… it was right. 🙂
I haven’t tried this one yet but I should. It’ll be interesting to see. Most of my tests are coming back as girl.
How fun! I remeber doing all those gender predictor things fun to do but not always right 🙂
It will be fun to see if it is true. I have heard of this but never tried it.
says im having a GIRL.. well see
Is marriage an outdated institution? Or simply a misused one? Many people get married, and many people get divorced, and when this happens an accusing finger is often pointed at the concept of marriage today, the idea being with one person forever, as the problem. Is it possible that the problem is choosing the wrong […]
I think there are a lot of couples that don’t want to work to keep a marriage going. I don’t think it’s outdated, but I do think that there are a lot of people that treat it like trying out a new pair of shoes.
well thanks for the scary stats since this is my first marriage but my husbands third 🙂 I’m not totally naive and I KNOW it takes two to make it work or NOT make it work but his first two wives checked out so HOPEFULLY we can be in the 25% for third marriages.
I think it’s so sad that so many marriages end in divorce.
Ahhhh. Marriage is something you have to work at to keep it alive. You wouldn’t expect your houseplants to thrive without water would you? Moving from crisis to crisis is not healthy–but sometimes life can be a byotch and when you come up for air, you discover you haven’t fed your relationship. I’m not opposed to divorce; sometimes it is the right solution. But I’m not a fan of giving up easily. If it’s worthwhile, it’s worth fighting for.
Sharon (married 35 years)
I know people that aren’t totally “pro” marriage, but I am. I have to say I love and agree with Sharon’s comment above and I haven’t been married anywhere close to that length of time!
It’s sad to see that the divorce rate is so high. I for one still believe in marriage though.
What a great insight into the institution of marriage. I agree 100%!
I personally believe the problem with marriage is they aren’t willing to fight for it. They change spouses about as often as they change their underwear and aren’t aware or don’t care about the consequences.
I think the failures of second marriages, third marriages, etc. are what make the 50% divorce statistic so high!
I think when both people truly are invested in a strong relationship and believe there is no option to give up, a beautiful but tough situation evolves. You go through hard times, you may argue and fight but you come out stronger and more reliant on each other. It’s always changing, sometimes a challenge…but oh so worth every second. Thank you for this beautiful blog Penelope!
People do choose divorce too quickly. I thought about and then thought about how it would affect my kids and I agreed for better or worse, so I stuck it out.
I definitely agree that people don’t value marriage in the same way they did in generations past. Divorce seems like an easy way out instead of putting work into a marriage and making it your priority. I’m thankful that I’ve managed to defy the odds (so far) after getting married at 18 and have been married 10 years later. No one ever said marriage is easy but you did promise to love and stay with that person until death do you part. People seem to think that’s a flexible vow.
I have come to realize that marriage isn’t for everyone. I have friends who have never married and are very content with the fact and then there are those who have divorced and don’t want to go back down that path.
And this is why I tell people one day Tobei and I will get married. Part of it has to do with the fact that we are having issues with him getting divorced and the other part is since it isn’t the first go around for either of us we are not in a rush. We are perfectly happy, our family is happy and both being basically divorced already we know it is not a must in life. I wear a ring (when not pregnant) and so does he. We hold each other as husband and wife and you know what… it works for us.
My sentiments exactly. EXACTLY!
I’ve seen good friends get married and divorced at a young age, so the thought of marriage scared me-until I found the right person. Then I realized that the weddings just happened to them-that they were maybe not ready, but went along for the ride. In hindsight, some things did not seen right, but we never said anything…
Now my husband and I understand our relationship needs maintenance from time to time, and since we took out vows very seriously, we don’t want a way out as an option. We have to court and continually try to impress and please each other, as if we were dating. it’s only been two years, but we will do anything to make it to fifty. I really meant my vows when I said them!
those statistics are very interesting – I completely agree with the age one – I got married when I was 20 (my husband is 10 years older than I am so he was 30) – and when I look back now I think ‘gosh, I was little more than a kid’ – We’ve been married 17 years, and very happily, but I’ve grown up a.lot. and know that he put up with a lot of immaturity at the beginning of our marriage. (It’s funny the roles are a little reversed now!).
great post! I agree. I didn’t get married until I was 30 and when I think back, that was a good choice for me. Personally, I wasn’t ready at 25. I wasn’t with the right person then either. People totally get married for the wrong reasons and when it ends they think it’s “marriage” that’s the problem.
I don’t think it’s outdated. I just think too many people go into it for the wrong reasons and expectations. I could have married my first child’s dad when I was pregnant, but I’m certain I would have been divorced.
Divorce is too easy to obtain and at the first sign of trouble whether it’s an argument over money or who left the wet towel on the floor they talk divorce. Some look at marriage as the “next step” in a relationship and don’t think about what it means.
Nobody wants to work for/at marriages anymore. It’s sad, really. Been with my hubby for 20 years – lived together 11, married 9). 🙂
I agree with your thoughts on putting your spouse too far on the list of important things being a cause of divorce. Marriage is sacrificial, and takes a good deal of strength and perseverance.
However, I’m confused by the facts you state about young marriage causing divorce–when your own grandparents were wed at 19 and the sweet story is posted on your blog as well.
I think it is not the age, or even the length of time that you know the person to whom you will be married–but the commitment to them that really counts. If you mean forever, mean forever-because even if you dated for 6 years instead of 3 months, there will be things you’ll learn, and things that will be hard; and all you will have is your commitment to get you through.
Blessings.
My guess is that today, most people at 19 are not ready to be married (my grandparents married in the early 1900’s and were very committed). In today’s society, keeping promises and commitments is not emphasized when raising children, and so for a majority 19 is too young to be married. That doesn’t mean couples that marry young won’t be happy and stay together (it just means their chances are harder and those that succeed are in the minority in the US).
Children today are very much raised with a “What about me?” attitude, and in a marriage it can’t be all about one person, and it takes maturity to develop into a person who is unselfish enough to be a good spouse.
Great question! Thank you for asking.
Another thought provoking article. I agree with both Sally and Penelope in the comments section here too.
I agree with Penelope that the vast majority of young people are not marriage-ready to say the least. I agree with Sally that when the right level of commitment through strong values is present, a marriage is given its essential foundation.
A big part of the problem behind the growing “I think marriage is a thing of the past” phenomenon (just over 50% of young American adults agreed with this statement in major recent survey; as did 40% of older adults) is the popular media driven lack of precisely those values.
I would add to both Penelope and Sally’s points by saying that it’s not just the lack of values that makes early marriage so challenging in this age, but also that there is a lack of the kind of basic relationship maintenance skills, like communication and collaborative problem solving, that any healthy, resilient marriage depends upon to thrive.
Come on people! Wake up! Have you seen the stats on marriage lately??? Would you get on a plane if it were announced in the boarding area that, “today’s flight has a 50% chance of crashing.” For Christ’s sake – my own grandmother urged me to not get married (she was happily married for just about her entire life). Do the words greedy, self-absorbed, narcissistic, and shallow mean anything to anyone now? For the love of God people – get a grip on reality! I have a great career, make lots of money, have my own home, have lots of toys, a couple of cars, a boat, a dog, and lots of money in my bank account. I would never, EVER put all that I’ve worked for at risk over a coin flip. Three words to study carefully people – ‘No Fault Divorce’. Today, women are men and men are women. Freaky!
I’d take the 50% chance and keep my marriage and do my best to make it the very greatest it can be over a life of toys and things that don’t matter any day. All of those things are just Stuff. A marriage full of love can make you Truly happy, unlike those things, which can only make you Temporarily happy. My husband and I got married at 18 and had our first child by 19. All of statistics say we will fail. I say, it’s worth the fight.
Hey Brian…will your “toys” do you any good when you’re old and alone?
My parents are still married, which I know is becoming rarer but I believe in it. It’s not easy but most worthwhile things aren’t.
Sometimes people don’t just change… they become someone barely recognizable from who they once were.
Interesting post.
Penelope;
Thank you for your posting on twitter.
If there is a movement towards marriae being an outdated institution, then I think we might want to write a quick e-book on “How to Survicve the coming Chaos”……..(wish I had the talent to do this one)
One thing is for sure, in my opinion, no one has walked the perfectly straight and narrow path for about 2000 years or so, depending on your favorite author.
So, since marriage has it’s personal bumps and challenges for each committed, loving, well intentioned couple, maybe it’s time we started a therapeautic (sp) blog……and that would make my day!
Your fan,
Richard Oberhausen
@richoberhausen
I’ll take my chances. I met my husband 25 years ago and we’re still together–not ever even coming close to divorce.
I loved being married, but I feel no need to ever do it again. I like the sense of freedom it gives me and that I don’t have to be accountable or feel like I need to report in to anybody unless I want to do that. Now I just do what I do and tell him what my plans are. Plus, separate money is SWEET!
We married at 20 and 22 which was too young in retrospect. The grace of God and hard work has kept us together 11 years.
Love a good food festival? Grub Hub is making life in the Big Apple a little sweeter by hosting its first New York City Food Festival for New Yorkers from September 21st to October 14th! GrubHub is an online and mobile service that brings together New York City diners to thousands of fabulous restaurants to […]
Sounds pretty cool – checking out since I’m close to NYC 🙂
I so want to move to NYC now!! That looks like such an awesome app!!
Wish I was closer to NYC this sounds like a great idea!
What a cool idea!
This sounds like a great event!
I’m jealous that you have that available!
Sounds cool!
I love any kind of food fest 🙂
Sounds like a great day!
These are awesome pictures! What a beautiful day.
I have never visited Boston but when I do I am definitely catching a sox game!
Looks like a fun time was had by all!
Fenway park was my favorite part of Boston. Glad you all had fun!
Looks like a wonderful day!
your little guy is so cute! Go Yankees!
How fun! Great photos and it looks like such a fun time.
This is great, I’d love to visit Fenway.
Fun stuff! I wish we had more baseball events in Canada – I really enjoy watching it
That looks like so much fun. I have always wanted to go to a baseball game. The closest I came was walking the outside of a field in Dallas LOL
It looks (& sounds) like you had a wonderful time! I love your new layout BTW!
Looks like you had lots of fun!
I have always wanted to go to Fenway!
It sounds like a great day!
NO way is that your little guy. WOW he’s getting so big. What a fun day at the park w/baseball
That’s pretty cool that the bar lets fans do that!
Go Yankees! ;0)
What an amazing time, I have been there a few times and loved it, love the East Coast Parks!
Glad you had a blast at Fenway! I’ve never been to Boston, but I hope to be able to visit it someday soon! LOVE the bottom picture!
Boston continues to sound more and more amazing!
Looks like lots of fun!
What great pictures, definitely a great memory.
Looks like a lot of fun!